Somewhere along the way, being nonchalant became a personality trait. Nobody wants to text first, admit they miss somebody, or risk looking like the person who cares more. In a dating culture where showing too much emotion can feel like losing, and everyone else seems determined to prove how little they care, Eli Derby is doing the exact opposite.
The Maryland-born singer, songwriter, producer, and multi-instrumentalist is making a case for vulnerability with his Warner Records debut EP, LOVESHY. Across 11 tracks, Derby explores attraction, heartbreak, regret, and the uncomfortable reality of wanting someone without necessarily knowing what to do with those feelings.
We’ve all heard of being shy, and we’ve certainly heard of being in love, but putting those two words together felt like the perfect description of a generation that wants romance without the emotional exposure that comes with it.
For Derby, being love shy means being confident in almost every aspect of life except the one that requires telling someone how you genuinely feel. “Dating can be an ego trip,” he says, also reflecting on how social media has influenced the way people approach relationships.
He admits he’s not necessarily exempt from that struggle himself. Although creating LOVESHY helped him confront some of those emotions, Derby admits he’s still learning how to navigate them. His understanding of love has evolved beyond simply finding the courage to express his feelings. He’s also learning the importance of knowing his worth and refusing to settle.
“I think through the music I’ve been able to kind of confront being love shy.”
That process of learning and growing runs through the new EP. Rather than presenting himself as someone who has figured out love, Derby lets listeners hear him work through experiences without a clear resolution.